sometimes.

sometimes, i wish i would just forget to breathe.



weirdly enough it happens. maybe i want it to? i actually need to have the thought to breathe on several occasions. am i that suicidal including subconsciously?

there is nothing like inflicting pain on you. when the world caves in on you. and you have no where else to go. nothing else to do. smoking helps but you want the pain. so you cut. you try to cut deep but you're not looking for attention. i'm not. i just want to feel alive. to know that this i reality. this is life. pain is life. i'm alive. xx