i said goodbye. .

but i really wish i didn't.

with every second since i said we should break up i've been dying to call him back and say i'm sorry i didn't mean it.

i just wish he wud go like no i love you be with me.

instead he said yeah okay.

dear ashraf,

you said you jumped through every hoop i asked you to.

maybe you didn't. maybe it wasn't enough for me.

i miss you quite terribly now. it's going to suck to be seeing you and not being able to talk to you. it's gonna suck to not to be able to hang out with you anymore. or take walks with you anymore.

i don't know which kills me more. to be with you or be without you. but i guess i have to find out. and hopefully i would last you know.

i love you.

i loved you.

but when i heard what you said to your friends about me.

i was like wow i'm just a thing you got and now you want to toss?

so i beat you to the punch.

i just wished you loved me the way you loved her.

i wished you showed me more of you instead of hiding you away or anything.

i told myself i would wait till tarun leaves to see whether wud things be okay again but i didn't have the strength. so help me. you're making it sound like you don't know why i broke up with you. i think you do. if you don't then you must be damn oblivious. or insensitive.

i miss you.

how long have i been in this storm?

14 hours and counting.

wow i suck balls.

I think I'm better off without this
I think I'm better off when I can't see your face
Who's taking my place?
It's been an hour since you left me
Just sixty minutes, and I am sure I'm fine
Just watchin' the time…

i just wish you would call me and say i need you back in my life ranjie but apparently i need to stop living in this fantasy world cause i know you wud never ever do that. i wud be the one running back to you.

fuck this shit i'm tired xxx