"nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet"
i screwed physics. i'm nothing but a disappointment to myself and everyone around me.
sighs.
i cut myself again. the pain doesn't seem to last anymore, am i getting immuned? or is it just not as deep as it's supposed to be.
i feel like i've been waiting around for a twist to take place. something that would give me hope. something that would make me feel less in pain with every breath i take.
my life isn't like a poem, a series, a song, or a movie is it?
justice wouldn't be served. and people don't give a shit.
his affection is like the moon, inconsistent.
people hurt me. =/
to take up a challenge of no more alcohol is going to be hard.
because you need a support system. to run to when you don't think you can go through with a certain something.
alcohol was mine.
to give up on the only thing that has never failed me-
it's going to be hard yeah?
why do i care what people say about me being an alcoholic?
it's not like they are there to take care of me.
i feel like i'm self destructing again. giving up on things that make me, me.
thinking about tomorrow leaves me shaking.
i don't know how long more can i put on a happy mask.
i'm EXHAUSTED to the core of my bones.
would somebody rescue me already?
maybe the next time i cross the road a car would send me where i've been wanting to go so badly.
maybe i'd just be stabbed to death.
or shot.
or whatever.
i just know i don't wanna be here. yet i have to.
my tears dry on their own-
i'm tired of acting happy.
i actually want to be happy.
xx
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